From: Karnivax (karnivax@my-deja.com)
Subject: Re: [PW!] Anime-niacs, Part 1
Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon
Date: 2000/06/27
> >"That fiend, Proto Man, has caused a disturbance in the very anime convention
> >that I so conviently am in attendance!" he announced. "He is now fleeing the
> >scene in what is no doubt part of some sinister plot that has taken or is
> >taking place in this very convention center! I must now take my Impressive
> >Anime-Sword of Death and partake justice upon him!" Captain Anime- zing
> >pulled out an embarassingly large sword from behind his cape and charged at
> >Shard, yelling, "Have at ye, villain!"
>
> Shard whirled around, blocking the sword with his Inconveniently Huge Shield.
> "I think not, Captain Anime-noyance. I have no reason to stick around
> further," said Shard.
>
> With that, he leapt high into the air and through the center's skylight. As he
> disappeared, a yellow scarf fluttered to the ground.
>
> Shard quickly released Smirker. "I hope you appreciate the things I do for
> you, Shockwave," said Shard. Shockwave and Cathode "PikaCHAAA!"ed in unison as
> the gigantic beast began to take off.
>
Kyle, still a bit dazed from Banshee's mallet, awkwardly stood up
and started frantically pressing buttons on his Pokédex. Espio's
Pokéball disappeared from Kyle's belt only to be replaced by Grendel
the Aerodactyl's. "He's not getting away!" Kyle thundered as he
hurled Grendel's Pokéball straight up into the air. Grendel
materialized, soared up at an angle from the Pokéball, and smashed
right through the building's ceiling. "Grendel, chase that other
Aerodactyl!" Kyle bellowed at his Pokémon. Shaking his fists in rage,
he added, "Hyper Beam that little bastard out of the sky!!!" His face
was turning bright red again. He fell to his knees.
"Kyle, you have to calm down! That vein in your forehead -"
Jessica went over to try and help him up, but Kyle waved her off.
"He's...not...getting...away!!!" Kyle repeated through sneering
teeth.
As Smirker took flight, a small piece of plastic fell through the
broken skylight to the Convention Center floor. Kyle got up and ran to
the plastic rectangle. It was his credit card. Oddly, this made his
face redden even further. Jessica swore she could see steam rising
from Kyle's hat. As Kyle put the credit card back in his wallet, he
unleashed a steady and loud stream of cusswords. Jessica clapped one
hand over his mouth, held one of his arms behind his back, and grinned
uneasily at the silent crowd. Unbeknownst to Jessica, the crowd was
silent primarily because it was ogling her.
Kyle fought a primal urge to backhand Jessica away with his free
hand. As Kyle watched Grendel fly after Smirker, his face very slowly
returned to its normal hue.
"I never had you pegged as a poster boy for suppressed rage," a
smiling Jessica told Kyle.
"Well hey, the only difference between a neurotic and the rest of
us is that the neurotic is willing to talk about his neuroses," a
calmer Kyle responded.
Meanwhile, just above the Convention Center, Shard was making his
getaway with Grendel in hot pursuit. Grendel was a fair bit higher in
level than Smirker, and a fair bit faster as a result. As soon as
Grendel closed within twenty feet of Smirker, he took a deep breath and
unleashed a mighty Hyper Beam blast. A panicked Smirker turned to one
side to dodge the massive beam. Shard's Aerodactyl heaved a sigh of
relief as he saw the Hyper Beam fly harmlessly out in front of
him. "Missed Smirker!" Smirker shouted.
"What was Kyle thinking, sending an Aerodactyl after a guy with
two Pikachu?" Shard scoffed. "Shockwave, bring Swoop over there
down." He prepared to toss Shockwave into the air so the Pikachu could
strike Grendel with an electric attack of some description. But
Shockwave was not interested. Even with the heated chase that was
going on, Shockwave and Cathode were interested only in romance. Shard
sweatdropped. "This complication I did not foresee..." He turned to
see Grendel charging up another Hyper Beam from what was now point-
blank range. He said feebly, "Smirker, when we're plummetting back to
terra firma, try to aim for that swimming pool down there."
Grendel opened his massive jaws and fired a second Hyper Beam,
this one even bigger than the last. Smirker made a valiant attempt to
fly out of the way, but the blast clipped his wing nonetheless.
Frenzied and in pain, Smirker started to fly much faster...and totally
out of control. As Smirker erratically bolted toward an indeterminate
destination, Shard cried, "Looks like Shard's blasting off...uh...for
the first time eveeerrr!!!" Smirker and his passengers disappeared in
a star-like twinkle.
Realizing that he had no hope of catching up to Smirker at that
point, Grendel snapped his primitive fingers and headed back to the
Convention Center.
(OOC: I'm leaving for California tomorrow! See y'all at the end of
next week!)
--K * A * R * N * I * V * A * X--
"Some have said there is no subtlety to
destruction. You know what? They're dead."
--Jaya Ballard, task mage
